There is something about the brain dump that comes when I write things down. I tried using google calendar, Cozi and a few other apps to keep everything easily accessible and easily shareable but it just wasn't working. My brain still felt like it was swimming all the time. A few years ago I ordered an Erin Condren LifePlanner * based on a recommendation from a friend and I loved it! It's a bit more expensive because of the Canadian exchange rate, the shipping and the duties I seem to end up always paying since the dollar took a tumble a couple of years ago- but I haven't found one I like as much and, frankly, if I'm going to use something every single day I had better love it.I use my planner to keep track of all the kids activities, my design business, my coaching and fitness programs. I like to make it look pretty and I keep all my reminders there- and still I don't have all my shit together.
I was having a great chat with a friend the other night and I was admiring her dedication to getting to the gym every day and that I just couldn't seem to get my shit together to get back into it. She remarked that I was the most organized person that she knows and I told her it's all an illusion. Okay maybe not all of it. On one hand I feel super organized, I've got my budget, schedule and to do's in one place. On paper I am perfectly organized and moving forward. Real life is often another story.
Sure I've gotten much better at being on time, no one has missed an activity yet and orders and business tasks are done on time. Having a party? those boxes all get checked and things usually go off really well even if I have to take a few short cuts or prioritize and drop things off the lists. My house is clean because I have a husband who keeps on top of it and we have someone come in every 2 weeks to get to the nitty gritty that I never have time to do (It's heaven and WAY cheaper than a divorce) and my stress level goes way down after I get everything down on paper. We even manage our monthly budget and keep track of upcoming household expenses that we need to plan for in my planner.
My real challenge is in following through when the goal/task is focused on me or something I want. How many of you can relate to that? It's all about what our children need or what others need and there is very little fuel left in the tank after those obligations are met. I've lost track of how many times I have written that I'm turning a new leaf and putting myself first. I preach about self care and I have this mental block that comes into play whenever I start to focus on me. I've always had this nagging voice in the head that holds me back, whose fear of failure keeps me from pushing past my comfort zone, I get out of it for awhile but then when I start to see real progress and things start to get uncomfortable instead of propelling me forward fear takes hold and I start to slip into old habits. It's sad really, I know what I need to do, I can help others get there but getting myself there is taking time. I need to stop getting in my own way.
One other thing I'm going to accomplish this weekend is finishing my office area organization. I dare you to find a crafter who's office didn't look like the pre-IKEA white boxes image right after the Christmas rush. I got it 90% there the first weekend of January- it still sits unfinished because I've had other stuff to do- a hockey tournament, orders, school stuff for the kids. No more excuses! I'll get it done and show you the proof next week!
Wish me luck!
*if you use my referral link to make a purchase from Erin Condren, I receive a $10 referral bonus*
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